I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Randomize
