Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
