I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
