We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Randomize