I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
