my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
