can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
