I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
organizing the empties. That sober.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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