I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
