Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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