Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
