Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize
