Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
