Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You need Xanax blowdarts
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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