it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
