your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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