For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
