i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
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