No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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