she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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