I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize