I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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