So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Randomize
