I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
