Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
