dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You need a sexual gate keeper
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
