Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
