Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
