it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Do vagina's smell?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
