My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
