Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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