just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
