ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
