we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Just pee around me
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Randomize
