Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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