Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
