it was like his penis was on wheels.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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