Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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