Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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