this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
