Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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