SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
