I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
