i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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