a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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