So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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