There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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