I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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