so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize