hotel room ftw
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
