There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
What a dumb baby whore.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
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